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Joke of the Day

"What did the management consultant think of his job? It was the Bain of his existence."

"These microwaved pot stickers taste like fixed income."

"The cheetah is the fastest land mammal right after a politician backpedaling about an opinion he didn't want the public to know about"

"Two Scottish guys discussing a wedding.. First guys asks ""What are ye wearing to yer weddin'?"" Second fella says ""A kilt of course!"" First fella ""What's the tartin?"" ""She's wearing white"" says his pal"

"Who do Canadians call when their car breaks down. Triple Eh!"

"What does a colour's laugh sound like? Hue hue hue"

"Having no tattoos in 2014, is like having tattoos in 1967."

"I don't care how old you are, the only safe way to guarantee the monster under the bed doesn't grab you is to use the run and jump method."

"What did the mermaid wear to her math class? An algae bra."

"I returned from court to see 'Welcome home dad' hanging over the foyer.. It was a suspended sentence"