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Joke of the Day

"The cheetah is the fastest land mammal right after a politician backpedaling about an opinion he didn't want the public to know about"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo and a chickpea? I've never had a garbanzo on my face."

"I got a tattoo of a gong Because I heard it's cool to get a tattoo of a Chinese cymbal"

"chicken pot pie. my three favorite things"

"9 out of every 3 people suffer from math illiteracy."

"About to hit the ball Boss: you said you'd played before? Me: uh yes Boss: that's a putter Me: Is that wrong? Boss: wrong for squash yes"

"What is the hottest part of a man's face? His sideburns."

"A man crashed his car A man crashed his expensive car into a tree... He finally found out how the Mercedes bends"

"If you're a Mormon, and you have a mom, and you haven't been referring to her exclusively as Mitt Momney...then why the hell are you Mormon?"

"Ugh. Do I really need to register to your website to leave a comment? I just need to disagree with this asshole real quick."