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Joke of the Day

"Took me 5 minutes to pick up the soap I dropped in the shower so I hope I never commit a felony."

"I was going to tell a straight joke... Vagina fuck it"

"My friend decided to become an astrophysicist instead of an engineer. I guess you could say he got sucked into black holes."

"(in a rowboat with 6 starving people) ""I think you mean ""WHOM should we eat first"""

"What do you call someone who stole home plate? A rapist."

"For some reason, my girlfriend asked how I view lesbian relationships... Apparently ""in HD"" was the wrong answer..."

"What's the difference between bullets and everyone ? Everyone misses Harambe."

"Ever want to have rodeo sex? Get on top and call her by the wrong name and try and hold on for 8 seconds."

"I'm glad I didn't go to primary school with Freud. I bet his ""your mom"" jokes made a few kids cry."

"Someone accused the Mona Lisa of killing a man. But I think she's been framed"