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Joke of the Day
"HELLO automatic flushing toilet!! I appreciate the enthusiasm but I really wasn't finished"
Next Joke
"What's the name of the operation to change a woman into a man? Addadictomy."
"Why is Europe like a frying pan?? They both have Greece at the bottom!!"
"What do you end up with when your pig smokes pot? Baked ham."
"Good Cop: If you tell us where the money is we can help you. Bag Cop: *majestically floats around the interrogation room on AC currents*"
"What do you call a robot dressed in drag? A transition metal."
"I got tired of resetting all my clocks after all the power outages this week. Today I woke up at the crack of random, blinking time o'clock."
"A mouse jumped out of my stove, but I couldn't catch it. It was out of my range."
"Me: I can't live like this anymore, I need to start eating healthier. Also Me: I couldn't decide between nuggets or a burger so I got both."
"Why did the Hipster order piping hot soup? He wanted to eat it before it was cool."