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Joke of the Day

"2 cannibals... ...are eating. One turns the other and says ""You know, I really don't like my sister."" The other cannibal replies ""Fine then, try the pot pie."""

"I can't believe how strong the winds were last night. I nipped out to get my wife some milk and got blown into the f*cking pub."

"What do you give a cannibal late for Sunday lunch? The cold shoulder"

"If your kids are playing and it gets totally quiet, then you hear one say ""you're okay, you're okay,"" they are definitely NOT okay."

"How did the possessed lady lose weight? Diet and exorcise."

"How do you spot a vegan at the gym? Pretty much the same as anyone else."

"I wanted to fold the toilet paper and use it again... but felt that it was too tainted"

"Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, ""I need your weight not your phone number"""

"Confucious he say... Man who fart in church, sit in his own pew..."

"Trump's plan for global warming: nuclear winter."