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Joke of the Day

"A minister was asked by a politician ""Name something the government can do to help the church."" The minister replied ""Quit making one dollar bills."""

"What do you call a powerful, asshole-ish potato? A dick-tater."

"Who does Hitler call when his dog is sick? A Veteran Aryan"

"Where did Hitler keep his armies? In Poland, France, and Czechoslovakia."

"No matter how hard I try, I just never seem to run out of bad ideas."

"did you hear about the farmer who was also a comedian I heard all his jokes were corny"

"My best friend just ask me to be her maid of honor. What did I ever do to her???"

"7 y/o daughter: Hey dad, can I see your phone for a minute? Me: You got a warrant?"

"Never really had a nickname in my life.. Except maybe that one time a bunch of chumps called me ""The defendant"" for a full day."

"The other day I saw a short man carrying an LED tv and I asked "" hey do you help carrying that tv?"" And he replied all pissed off ""Fuck off dude, this is my tablet"""