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Joke of the Day

"why send male soldiers into war women on there period is good enough"

"First the found ice on Mars and then they found water, now they just need to find whiskey to prove that 'Men are from Mars'."

"Me: *Sweeping* Wife: Excuse me Me: *Slams broom on floor* YOU SHALL NOT PASS Wife: ... Me: That's from lord of Wife: MOVE! Me: *Moves*"

"Why was the robber so secure? He was a safe robber."

"Happy New Year! Welcome to 20!"

"""Tim's coming tonight"" ""Tim with hooves for feet or Tim that likes to bang coconut halves together?"" [in the distance] clip-clop clip-clop"

"A popular post on reddit about a clothing store has to be a hot topic"

"The Greatest Detective Stories Ever Told by Watts E. Dunn"

"Talking to women is a lot like origami. I don't know where to start and I always end up screaming."

"What do you call salesman with a lisp? Rodger. He's the one with the lisp, not you, so why would you call him anything different?"