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Joke of the Day

"At my new job I have 500 people under me. I mow grass at a cemetery."

"Did you know Garfield the cat used to be a hip hop artist? Word is he used to rap with OdieB"

"Why do sneaky rogues prefer to wear leather? Because it's made of hide."

"Who was the chicken's favorite musician? Bach."

"What do you call a boring meme about some internet drama that you don't care about? Dramameme."

"Can't remember the name of that 80's song, huh? You might have Wham!nesia..."

"Your mom is so dumb.... She tried to climb Mountain Dew"

"Boss: why do you deserve this promotion? Me: goes into very in depth pointless rant B: what drugs are you on? Me: good ones *leaves*"

"If there was a competition for saggy tits, my wife would beat everyone. In fact, she'd wipe the floor with them."

"Chief Exec: Any Ideas? Writer 1: Talking Animals! Writer 2: How about a Princess? Writer 3: Kill the parents! -Brainstorming at Disney"