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Joke of the Day

"Chinese guy enters a grocery shop... A chinese guy enters a grocery shop and asks: -- ""Chunshun guashi Coca Cola"" The shopkeeper responded: -- ""A bottle of what?"""

"Twitter's new ""local"" feature tells me that ""goodmorning"" and ""nowthatsghetto"" are trending here in Washington. Wow. This is a game-changer."

"Having swords for arms was a terrible first wish but it was a genie and I blurt weird things out when I panic."

"What is the funniest two legged lizard? The stand-up chameleon."

"What are you if you hide eggs at nice places eggspert."

"How do you get whole race to hate you? Blow up the finish line. (I figured 2 years was long enough)"

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay $39 to have a garbanzo bean on my chest."

"What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't fuck my pizza before I toss it in the oven for dinner."

"My co-worker walks by holding asprin in his hand... He says, they say the weakest link in the chain goes first, I guess that's my head."

"What do you call a stock broker having sex in the middle of his work? Insid'er trading. http://i.imgur.com/oTp4lvG.gif"