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Joke of the Day
"What do necrophiliacs get at funerals? Mourning wood."
Next Joke
"So in conclusion, the burglars in Home Alone 2 absolutely would have died. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk"
"Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil. An explanation please?"
"I heard Simon say, ""Turn to the next page."""
"Me: I'll take one insurance Insurance salesman: It doesn't work like that Me: *shoving $12 in his breast pocket* your best one, please"
"What do you call it when the only cow on your dairy farm won't produce milk? Utter despair."
"Helium walks into a bar The bartender says, ""We don't serve your kind here"". Helium had no reaction."
"*walk up to woman breastfeeding baby* Is this guy bothering you?"
"The Energizer bunny was just releases from prison. He was charged with battery. . . ."
"I'm not happy about my girlfriends one night stand. I'd really like somewhere to put my phone and spare change when we go to bed."