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Joke of the Day

"The Energizer bunny was just releases from prison. He was charged with battery. . . ."

"Calm down white moms on dish detergent commercials, no wife is EVER that excited about dishes. Ever."

"my ex-gf had multiple personalities it was like having sex with a diff woman everynight except the time she turned into some guy named harry"

"You know what cats don't like? Blow dryers. You know what's funny? Pointing your blow dryer at your cat. Anyway, I lost an eye today."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Beethoven ! Beethoven who ? Beethoven is too hot !"

"I tried to read a book on Nordic countries, but... I tried to read a book on Nordic countries, but I couldn't Finnish."

"How many tickles does it take to make an octupus laugh? Ten tickles."

"Did you hear about the documentary on perforations? It was terrible"

"I went to look at tents today. But I didn't buy one. There was nothing before them, there was no pre-tents."

"How did the newspaper go about reviewing the opera production? They followed Standard Opera-rating Procedure"