178013
Joke of the Day
"Every morning when my alarm goes off I think ""This is the worst thing that has EVER happened."""
Next Joke
"I bought a lottery ticket the other day. I didn't win anything. I've come to the conclusion that the lottery is a bunch of balls."
"[wife in labor] *i press play on cassette {Ice Cube - You Can Do It} Wife:WHAT THE HELL Me: sorry hun *ff to {SaltNPeppa - Push It}"
"Bathrooms without noisy ventilation fans make me feel unsafe"
"What do you say when someone hands you a nice, ripe blunt in Germany? Danke"
"A redhead tells her blonde stepsister... ...""I slept with a Brazilian...."" The blonde replies, ""Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?"""
"What did the milk say after it got beat? ...It's butter this way"
"After 10 missed calls in a row, I'm tempted to answer the phone just so I can find out who wants to be murdered."
"Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop."
"Loses house keys. Builds new house."