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Joke of the Day

"Me: Rest assured I will go to the grave with your secret. Pat: Thank you. Me: Unfortunately so will my golfing buddies."

"Doctor doctor I'm having difficulty sleeping. Doctor: Well maybe it's your bed. Oh I'm all right at night it's in the day I have problems."

"Why does the shortage of strip clubs in the middle east make ISIS so angry? Because there aren't enough ho stages."

"Did you hear about that party at Thor's? No, I guess you wouldn't have; he kept it pretty Loki."

"Wanna hear a dyslexic joke? Knock there who's knock?"

"Bin Laden's neighbours interviewed ""we had no idea...he just kept himself to himself really..."""

"I want to tell a chemistry joke... But all the good ones argon."

"Q: How does a bull stay warm on a bitterly cold day? ... ... A: He goes into the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey."

"Wife: Want do you want for dinner? Me: Surprise me. Wife: I used to be a man. Me: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Pizza."

"What's black underneath and white on top? Society."