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Joke of the Day

"How do you confuse a complete idiot ? 32"

"What did the cannibal get when he was late to dinner? The cold shoulder"

"Boss rushes frantically into manager's office... ""Hey, have you been screwing my assistant?"" ""No!"" ""Great! Then YOU fire her."""

"I don't care about following a 'funny' celebrity from tv on Twitter-instead I look up who writes for their show then follow that person."

"Who is the best jewish cook in the world? Hitler"

"Keep away from professional dermatologists.. They make rash decisions"

"What do you call a mexican protein? Amigo Acid"

"I swallowed some food coloring the other day. I'll be alright, but it feels like I dyed a little inside."

"""I wish you would stop staring at my breasts. "" said the barmaid, ""you're making me uncomfortable. "" ""Uncomfortable?"" I replied, ""you want to try sitting on one of these stools with an hard on. """

"What did the customer say to the overworked seamstress? Wow, you seamstressed out. (I'm so sorry)"