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Joke of the Day

"How do you confuse a complete idiot ? 32"

"So I'm going to start a business offering landscaping, painting, moving and other handy man services called Manuel labor"

"...Moth balls Have you ever smelled moth balls? . . . . . You have?...How'd you get the tiny little legs apart?"

"Little Johnny When I was a boy, I prayed, and prayed, for a bike but never got one. Then I realized that God don't work that way. So I stole a bike, then asked for forgiveness."

"OLD MAN: I fought in WWII ME: Oh yeah? What was your kill:death ratio OLD MAN: what ME: Can you rocket jump? OLD MAN: I wish Hitler had won"

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? It's gonna take me a little while to get hard, I just got laid by this chick."

"Everything happens for a reason. But, sometimes the reason is that you're stupid and you make bad decisions."

"Q: Why shouldn't you listen to people who have just come out of the swimming pool? A: Because they are all wet."

"Little league Played baseball with some orphaned kids today. :) I won. None of them seemed to know where home was."

"Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself? You would too if you were named Aaaurrrraaaaggghh!"