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Joke of the Day

"I scream. You scream. We all scream. This fancy wine bars toilet gender signs were unclear."

"If tomatoes are a fruit, then ketchup is a smoothie."

"I asked my wife for an audio book and she got me an encyclopaedia. That speaks volumes."

"In hell, the thermostat is guarded by a bunch of dads."

"Whenever I hear someone died of natural causes, I think, ""Wait a minute. I have that."""

"The 1920 Red Sox were completely ruthless..."

"I lost a lot of teeth eating candy at the wrong time of day. Just as her husband got home."

"What do you call a gay hipster? A douchefag."

"the host of the party told me to make myself comfortable so I went back home to bed"

"Accidentally ran over my neighbor's cat today and I was scared to tell him to his face so I left a note saying ""Curiosity was here"""