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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a blonde and a hen? The blonde doesn't sit still when she is on eggs."

"""Are you watching porn again??"" No way! This is an episode of 'How It's Made' about people."

"What did the Mexican wife say to her Husband? You'll never be president, Jeb."

"Watching Home Alone. Did the family not have ANY friends they could call? ""Yo we left our 8-year-old alone, can you get him & not call CPS?"""

"I eat a wide variety of foods: lasagna, tacos, hamburgers... and dim sum."

"Oral relief 'Darling, I want some.... Oral relief.' 'You mean you want a blowjob?' 'No, I just want you to shut up.'"

"I ordered the kit ""Make your wife beautiful"" And they sent me two bottles of Jagermeister."

"What goes: 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? 'click' is that it? A blind guy with a rubix cube"

"I asked my Nan what she wanted for Christmas. ""Something from the Body Shop please,"" she replied..... Hope she's got enough room in the flat for the front wing off a Mondeo."

"**SEX.** SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX. Now that you have my attention, go do the dishes for me."