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Joke of the Day
"I ordered the kit ""Make your wife beautiful"" And they sent me two bottles of Jagermeister."
Next Joke
"What's the hardest part to eat of a vegetable? The wheelchair"
"Are you an arson and a musician? WOOOOOOOAAHHHHHooOOO, YOUR SAX IS ON FIRE!"
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Camila ! Camila who ? Camila minute !"
"Why is Neil Degrasse Tyson such a famous physicist?... On the day he was born he escaped a black hole...... and then he spent his life studying them."
"How do you kill a one legged Fox? Make him run across Canada"
"[At make-up counter] But does this lipstick come off of a taint?"
"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't pay $300 to have a garbanzo bean on my face."
"My phone knows the word ""giveth"" but not the word ""fuck."" Perfectly useful for speaking to knights but not for describing what they did."
"Girls hope you celebrated Valentines Day responsibly, or you'll be celebrating Thanksgiving in a maternity ward"