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Joke of the Day
"According to this grocery list I've written on my hand, I've invented a new language."
Next Joke
"I'm so sick of employers asking me what I'm doing in the next four years It's not like I have 2020 vision"
"What is the Dothraki horde's favourite cheese? Khaloumi."
"Facebook tells me today is ""National Winnie the Pooh Day"" ... I hope they're ok with me just wearing a red t-shirt & no pants to the office"
"I broke my arm when I was a kid, my Dad carried me ten miles to the hospital, he has cancer, so that's why my tattoo is hot nurse. -LA Ink."
"Guinea Pig When I was five years old, my teacher asked me if I wanted to take the school guinea pig home. Seven months later, I arrived in the African republic of Guinea."
"Someone hired a sloth with a knife to murder me, he's in my driveway, so I have 6-8 months to live"
"What do you call a piece of pasta that doesn't have any friends? Cannelonely!"
"I got a new German cell phone I put it on airplane mode. It locked me out and then crashed"
"Knock Knock Who's there ! A Fred ! A Fred who ? Who's a Fred of the Big Bad Wolf ?"