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Joke of the Day

"Teacher : If you had five apples on your desk and the boy next to you took three what would you have ? Pupil : A fight !"

"If I get an email headed ""Dear Friend"", I know it's a scam. I don't have friends"

"A logician just had a baby Her friends ask her: ""A boy or a girl?"" She replies: ""Yes"""

"Scientists Have Captured the Sound One Atom Makes and what did the atom say? ""Does it really matter we make up everything."""

"What's the difference between an apple and a hormone? You can't hear an apple"

"Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: She fell out of the tree."

"My girlfriend left me for a midget the other day. This broke my heart I couldn't believe she would stoop so low."

"Q: What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments? A: Luters."

"Ladies, if your man says he'll fix it, he will. There's no reason to remind him every 6 months."

"How can you tell if someone is vegan? They'll tell you"