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Joke of the Day

"I'm just saying honey, if I sound like a cat throwing up hair balls the next day...it may be time to trim things up a bit."

"My grocery list is just a piece of paper saying don't run into anyone you know"

"Where do homeless accountants live? In a tax shelter. Blame GROCO PCA"

"I asked my girlfriend to shave her cunt. I woke up the next morning bald."

"Listening to coworkers try and explain Fight Club to another coworker and all I could think was ""we really shouldn't be talking about this""."

"I told wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back. Apparently you shouldn't say that to a woman with alopecia."

"A Brief History of Our Times: As televisions became flatter, people became rounder."

"The Vatican finally recognizes Palestine... Palestine replied, ""Dude. We've met like six times."""

"I like my beers how I like my NBA players with hops."

"Why does the Dalai Lama go to the bookies everyday? Because he likes Tibet."