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Joke of the Day
"Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? Because they all have phones!"
Next Joke
"There are certain people who assume that I'm intelligent. These people aren't aware that I cannot tear off perforated paper."
"What's the difference between feminism and a $100 bill? A $100 bill makes change"
"So I was dating a girl who had a lazy eye It would have worked out, but it turns out she was seeing someone on the side"
"If you're a ""Blocked caller"" you're gonna be a ""missed call."""
"What do you call a lizard that doesn't work? A reptile dysfunction."
"After a long day of having my laptop fry my genitals, it feels good to lie in a dark room and have my phone screen fry my eyeballs."
"They should make realistic pregnancy test commercials. 2 best friends in a bathroom praying for a neg & celebrating w a shot & a happy dance"
"VICTIM: He had a beard & a scar SKETCH ARTIST: Is this him? VICTIM: That's Bart Simpson SKETCH ARTIST: Yeah I can only draw a couple things"
"Why do married men love golf so much? Because it's not the same three holes over and over again."