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Joke of the Day

"4-year-old: *looks at our pig* Which pig is she? Me: What do you mean? 4: Is her house made of bricks or sticks?"

"Why was the lifeguard unable to save the hippie from drowning in the ocean? He was too *far out, man*."

"A termite walks into a bar... And he asks, ""is the bar tender here?"""

"My dad once said 'why are hemorrhoids called hemorrhoids and asteroids called asteroids and not the other way around?' I still laugh..."

"Why is Stevie Wonder in camouflage at the Grammys Because if he can't see us, we shouldn't be able to see him."

"I asked Santa for a new energy policy... ...but all I got in my stocking was a lump of coal. :-("

"So I saw a black man out on the street carrying a TV and thought, ""Hey, that looks just like mine.."", But then I remembered mine was at home shining my shoes."

"A homeless man told me to get home safely I smiled and said, ""You too!"""

"A man is knocked out during a robbery.His wife and children are brutally murdered- Pixar: Gee it's kinda dark ...Ok a FISH is- Pix: YES."

"Where do you buy Pikmin from? The Oli-Mart"