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Joke of the Day

"""When someone is mad at you, that's THEIR problem"" and other advice from my upcoming book, Where Did All My Friends Go'"

"Why did the console player get sick in the art gallery? There were too many frames."

"What are peas attracted to? Chickpeas"

"Did you hear about the cowboy who wore a hat made of paper towels? He had a bounty on his head."

"Love' is picking up tampons at the supermarket for your girlfriend. True love' is inserting them."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Eye Patch Barbie ...with a choice of eye patch colors: purple hot pink or aqua!"

"The only difference between the people I've dated and Charles Manson is that Manson has the decency to look like a nut case when you first meet him."

"So God, a Jew and a Zombie walk into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey Jesus"""

"Is it gay in here or is it just Glee?"

"A fish's Google search history: - do fish have short term memory? - do fish have short term memory? - do fish have short term memory?"