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Joke of the Day

"A fish's Google search history: - do fish have short term memory? - do fish have short term memory? - do fish have short term memory?"

"How is Donald Trump like a VW Bug? They both spew toxic hot air disguised as being good for Americans."

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue on his coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool."

"Did you hear about the Mexican guy who cheated on his wife? It was really sad and now he only sees his kids on weekends."

"Whats the worst the thing about having to attend a funeral? The guest of honor always shows up late!"

"""Luke, I have no idea who your father is."" #AlternateUniverseFilms"

"H:""Where'd you get those shoes?"" Me:""I've had these for years. Is that a new grill I saw?"" H:""Nope just cleaned the old one"" *Marriage lies"

"Why did John keep on finding cracker crumbs in his bed? His wife didn't know any decent crackers."

"The key to success is sincerity... Once you can fake that, you're golden."

"Can someone please explain why I have to pay full price for Swiss Cheese"