173882

Joke of the Day

"People always ask me why I procrastinate.. They say, ""you know, the early bird gets the worm."" I just respond, ""yes, but it's the second mouse that gets the cheese."""

Next Joke
 
"What do you call... What do you call nuts on the wall? -Walnuts. What do you call nuts on your chest? -Chestnuts. What do you call nuts on your chin? -Dick in your mouth."
"I cant believe I forgot to go to the gym this morning. That's 7 years in a row now."
"Doctor doctor people keep telling me I'm ugly! Lay on the couch face down."
"Sorry I can't go out. My phone is too old to hold enough charge so I live by this outlet now."
"Someone called me lazy today, I almost replied"
"I found out I'm part Native American..... my beard is Apache."
"Why are jewish people's noses so big Because air is free"
"My last days. If I ever end up on life support unplug me. Then plug me back in again and see if that works. REBOOT me baby!"
"Hey brotherrrr (by Avicii) There's an endless road to be disMOTHERed! Lmao"