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Joke of the Day
"Why do traffic lights never go swimming? Because they spend too much time changing."
Next Joke
"What do you say to a woman who didn't shave for a funeral? O-bitch-uary."
"I've been diagnosed with chronic fear of giants; Feefiphobia."
"You're right, sir. It's MY fault that your credit card was declined. Please, tell me again how much money you have in that account."
"Do retarded people know that they are retarded? Person A: Do retarded people know that they are retarded? Person B: I don't know, do you?"
"what did Putin say to Ukraine? Crimea river."
"Why did the gay guy fail his test? He couldn't think straight."
"I'm 72 minutes in trying to reverse whatever my 3 y/o nephew did in one second to the TV remote."
"My wife told me ""Sex is better on holiday"". That wasn't a very nice postcard to receive."
"In regards to the Noah movie: Make sure you take someone with you, I heard they're only selling tickets in pairs."