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Joke of the Day

"Q: What did one ocean say to the other ocean? A: Nothing, they just waved."

"White lies are fine. Don't tell a black lie though. Black lies matter."

"Dear lady arguing w/ the clerk over whether or not it is ""good"" champagne: YOU ARE IN A GAS STATION!"

"wander ten miles over the German border, shoot everybody in sight and then claim you were never over the line"

"A shirt so loud, you have to wear ear plugs when you put it on."

"We're out of duct tape, craft glue, and frozen orange juice because I made a sandwich while I was drunk last night."

"Once a marine, always a marine. Even if you're now working at Subway. You're a submarine."

"Do you know the difference between camping and molestation? No? In that case, do you want to go camping this weekend?"

"Little Known Fact: Bon Jovi has five brothers: Bon Joi, Bon Joii, Bon Joiii, Bon Joiv and Bon Jov"

"Why did Donald Trump watch the olympics? To see how high the mexicans pole vaulters can jump"