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Joke of the Day

"Why did Ted Cruz's father assassinate JFK? To get to the other side!"

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? How did you get his tiny little legs open?"

"A man went into a store to buy some condoms. ""That's 1 dollar 15 plus tax"" said the store assistant. ""I don't need tacks"" said the man. ""It'll stay up all by itself."""

"A seal walks into a bar... And the bartender says ""what will it be?"" The seal replies ""I'm fine with anything as long as it's not Canadian club."""

"[Target intercom] ""Would the parent of a 9 y/o named Jack please pick up your son at security. We've told u for weeks this isn't a daycare."""

"Geeky Joke There are 10 kinds of people: those who can count in binary, those who can't and those who weren't expecting a base 3 joke."

"What is the number 1 pickup line at a gay bar? May I push your stool in?"

"Friends are like condoms: They protect you when things get hard."

"Question Does having salt and pepper peubs make my dick look more distinguished?"

"Sometimes when I give money to homeless people, bystanders shout ""Why bother? They're only going to buy drugs or alcohol with it!""... oh, like I wasn't?!"