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Joke of the Day
"I called German UPS to ask them when they would ship my Rift.. They said, ""VR ready."""
Next Joke
"What does the NFL and Broke Back Mountain have in common? Cowboys that suck."
"[girl points at my scar] What happened? Oh that? Old sports injury. [flashback to me sprinting after an ice cream truck]"
"Prime Day."
"What's the best thing to do with a thimble? Bang it with a drum-thtick!"
"Why doesn't Oedipus curse? Because he kisses his mother with that mouth"
"What is the difference between a whore and a bitch? A whore will have sex with anybody, a bitch will have sex with anybody except you."
"I'm having a hard time with not using sexual innuendos. But it's hard *So hard*"
"How easy is it to get stoned in Amsterdam? It's a piece of cake."
"What if Bane's mask was really just a cool, elaborate electronic cigarette?"