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Joke of the Day

"An Australian drives up to a hitch hiker with one eye, no arms, and one leg And says ""Oi! You look 'armless! 'Op in!"""

"A black guy walks into the bar with a parrot on his shoulder The bartender then says ""Well that's special, where did you get it?"" ""Africa"" says the parrot"

"Fat lady hops on an Exercycle next to me, she says, ""I'm here to lose weight."" Me: ""And you waited 'til the last min, didn't you?"""

"How many Broncos does it take to change a tire? One. Unless it's a blowout then the whole team shows up."

"It must be difficult to post inspirational Tweets when your blood type is B Negative."

"Honey, let's make this cactUS a cacti. What I'm saying is I want a divorce, and I'm taking the cactus with me."

"Lovers When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"A girl asked me for a dick pic. I told her sorry, my phone doesn't take panoramic pics."

"Do you know what girls say to a guy with a big dick? I do!"

"Disney just announced plans for an animated adaptation of Dante's Inferno They're calling it, ""101 Damnations."""