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Joke of the Day

"(Nsfw)What must a vampire ask before he has sex? Is it alright if I cum inside?"

"I'm going to name my dog ""Syndrome"". Whenever he jumps on someone, I can yell, ""Down Syndrome!""."

"What is the difference between a 5 and a 2? 3."

"What do you tell a mathematician if he does drugs? You're high-on-pot...enuse. Thanks Key&Peele, I'll see myself out."

"Did you here about the women who died after masturbating with a carrot? That was a dildon't"

"Why is Valentine's Day the best day for a celebration? Because you can really party hearty! "

"Where does a pirate keep his buccaneer' s? Under his buccan-hat."

"I got my foot in the door, my head in the game, and my ass in gear. I'm one motivational tape away from a hospital admission."

"I find that women in nightclubs are like toilets in nightclubs They're either engaged or vacant and some of them are disabled"

"What is red and smells like blue Froot Loops? The murder-suicide scene at Toucan Sam's Miami penthouse."