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Joke of the Day

"*loses beer *opens new beer *finds old beer *drinks 2 beers I win"

"My German friend told me to pick him up dry wine. I brought the bottle to his house and he said, ""Thanks, where are the other two?"""

"What did Donald Trump say to Obama at the White House? You're fired!"

"I don't think my inner child is ever moving out."

"What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheel chair. (And yes, I know I'm going to hell)"

"Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi. And... Why did the fungi leave the party? Because there wasn't much room."

"Only one Chinese man lived in my hometown, and I still couldn't tell him apart."

"Welcome to plastic surgery anonymous I'm seeing a lot of new faces in the crowd this week and I have to say i'm really disappointed."

"When i dont understand a joke I read on /r/Jokes I don't get it"

"Did you hear about that proctologist who became an English teacher? Did you hear about the proctologist who became and English teacher? He specializes in teaching analogies."