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Joke of the Day

"Apparently my hub is a 92 yr old trapped in a younger body. He just referred to you guys as my Pinstagram friends."

"You know you're clumsy when you drop a stick playing air drums."

"Why did Angela Merkel ban use of crabgrass lawn treatments? She was told they would stop the ""German nation"""

"Heat or cold Which one travels faster, heat or cold? Heat, because you can catch a cold."

"If I had a penny for every Trump joke made during the election... I could be the president in 2020"

"I was the atm today and an old women asked for my help checking her balance So i pushed her over."

"A racist, a fascist, and an idiot walked into a bar ""What can I get you?"" Asked the bartender. ""I'll just have a water, and make sure the glass is small enough for my hands"" said Donald Trump."

"[Offensive] I like my wine the way I like my Women... Nine years old and in the cellar."

"Mr Monster: Oi hurry up with my supper. Mrs Monster: Oh do be quiet I've only got three pairs of hands."

"ID is a funny abbreviation. The I stands for I and D strands for dentification. -Norm Macdonald"