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Joke of the Day
"Doc: Your insurance won't cover it all. Me: What if I sewed myself shut? Doc: Suture self."
Next Joke
"""Doctor I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake."" ""Next time take off the candles."""
"What happens when a soviet and a german have a child? I don't know but he can conquer poland really fast."
"how do you know you are a real redneck? you let your 12yr old daughter smoke in front of her kids."
"girl at restaurant: ""Are you Tony Hawk?"" me: ""Yes."" her: ""Why?"" I had no idea how to answer."
"What did Liberace die from? Botulism. Bad meat in the can."
"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."
"What's better than breaking the seal on a bottle? breaking the seal on a rock."
"I heard that the cemetery is pretty popular.. Everyone's dying to get in."
"If we attacked Turkey from the rear... ...do you think Greece would help?"