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Joke of the Day
"I hope the people that monitor my sleep study tonight like watching a man scratch his taint."
Next Joke
"Which came first, chicken or the egg? Neither. I came first."
"Jews where do you send a jew with ADD...... wait for it... A concentration camp"
"How does Hitler turn on his lights? Aulightschwitz."
"I've got a long history of suicide in my family; the good news is it skips a generation... so if I'm lucky, my kids will kill themselves."
"Happy new year! Sorry, I suffer from premature congratulation."
"For our chemistry exam we had to write a thousand words on acid. Unfortunately my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted"
"IAN: Just how do fleas jump so high? ME: Your guess is as good as mine I: I reckon they wear tiny tiny Air Jordans M: Ok I take that back"
"I think the world of you! (Polluted, poor, generally prone to disaster.)"
"Today I forgot to comb my hair, but people thought I was nice. Then, nothing of consequence happened. So today was every Michael Cera movie."