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Joke of the Day

"Please continue to tell me how the life you created for yourself is so miserable instead of taking actual steps to change it."

"I have a vegan girlfriend... and she's nice and all, but sometimes I think she just looks at me like a piece of carrot"

"Have you ever smelled moth balls? How did you get his tiny little legs open?"

"It's sad that some of you need to berate others to feel better about yourselves. Idiots."

"When do you REALLY know you need to break up with you GF? When she starts winning arguments with you inner-voice."

"So a vegan sits down at a bar... I only know that because he won't shut the fuck up about it."

"""This is The Grey Wall of China"" I think it's 'great' ""We all do, pal"""

"What's a pirates favorite material? ~~Arrrgyle~~*YARRRN!*^Thanks ^Bravesurf"

"Why was Lara Croft sad? Because her career was in ruins"

"I went to the store for some flatbread... They had naan."