169696

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between fish and meat? If you beat your fish, it will die."

"Arsenal did the mannequin challenge for 89minutes at Old Trafford and still drew."

"Wiping with only one square of toilet paper is a meditative experience.... You really get in touch with your inner self."

"I have to be honest, I prefer the modern 8 bit byte to the older 7 bit byte I like big bytes and I cannot lie."

"Yes I am 45, male and love cats. Recently I posted a selfie. It could be worse though, right? Hello?"

"What do you call an Asian woman with one leg? Irene."

"1969: America winning space race with the Russians 2014: America keeping up with the Kardashians."

"Why does Peter Parker main spy in tf2? Because SPY DA MAN!"

"Played Monopoly with a kid & argued that I CAN buy the jail.. Teaching him a valuable lesson about the privitisation of the prison system."

"Black eye Tom: ""Hey buddy, howya do...whoa! who gave you that black eye? Sam: ""My wife"" Tom: ""I thought she was out of town for the weekend."" Sam: ""So did I."""