169257

Joke of the Day

"My GF called me ""behind the times"" today. I got so upset, I paused the VCR, paged my friends & asked them to fax me their best advice."

"Why is the moon tastier than Earth? It's meteor."

"There is a bomb going to explode in 3...2...1... Holy shit, this blew up!"

"I knew this neighborhood was classy enough for me when I saw there is a ""Pregnant Only"" parking spot in front of the Liquor store."

"Why was Star Wars shot Episodes 4, 5, 6, then 1, 2, 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was"

"The worst thing about being told you got Alzheimer... Is it just doesn't happen the once."

"How many Tourette's sufferers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fuck you god damn shit cunt just one of us asshole bitch bastard!"

"Why is it called a Wonder Bra? When she takes it off you wonder where her tits went."

"The Shawshank Redemption but it's just me tunneling from my office to the break room so I don't have to talk to my boss."

"My neighbor just threw out the biggest trash I have ever seen.. Boy, I will surely miss Mrs. Jones"