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Joke of the Day
"Why is it that every time I get ahead in life someone arrests me for grave-robbing?"
Next Joke
"It is a scientific fact that the gravitational pull of a woman's cleavage on a man's eyes is too strong to be fought!!!"
"Wearing high heels and releasing doves at weddings are so last century. I'll be wearing running shoes and releasing chickens at mine"
"Why was the plant embarrassed? It soiled itself. *Buh dum ts* *Dodges tomatoes*"
"Pinocchio When did Pinocchio learn he was made of wood? when his hand caught fire!!"
"Whoa whoa whoa. Stand down, nipples. It's just a little chilly weather, nothing to get excited about."
"My boyfriend doesn't believe in labels, which is probably why he drank all that bleach"
"You know whats scarier than a bee chasing you because i dont"
"Her: I bet you forgot it. Him: I have a photographic memory. [shakes violently] Her: ? Him: Sorry, it's a Polaroid. Is it Becky? Her: NO"
"You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals so let's cheat and murder for insurance money like they do on Investigation Discovery Channel."