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Joke of the Day
"A Jewish dad walks into a bar mitzvah. . edited to add the missing z"
Next Joke
"What do a sprinkler and an unemployment line have in common? Spic-spic-spic-CHINK-nigga-nigga-nigga-spic-spic-spic-CHINK-nigga-nigga-nigga (say out loud at your own risk)"
"What do you call a ghost in a torn sheet? A holy terror."
"How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change the bulb and another to hold the penis. ladder! I meant ladder."
"Watson, Sherlock Holmes's faithful assistant, asked, ""What's a ten-letter word meaning 'supplying nourishment'?"" Sherlock replied, ""Alimentary, my dear Watson."""
"I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything... ...trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself."
"Have you seen Jesus's abs?!! He must be doing that Cross-Fit workout!"
"[job interview] ""You wrote here your biggest weakness is not knowing what irony means."" ""Ironic isn't it? Is it? I don't know."""
"When do you kick a midget in the balls? When he is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice"
"I have to look up the word innuendo... If you know what I mean ;) Courtesy of Suits"