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Joke of the Day
"So is the 2020 Election Season open yet? Or is the succession now inherited?"
Next Joke
"Back off, doc. I'll close this wound. Suture self."
"How many Russians does it take to change a lightbulb? Two. One to hold the bulb and other to drink until the room spins."
"Her: Let's read your horoscope... Do you believe in astrology? Me: No. That's such a scam. Well, at least that's what my psychic says."
"ITALIAN MUSTACHES WHY DO MOST ITALIAN MEN HAVE MUSTACHES? A: SO THEY CAN LOOK LIKE MOM"
"why did the cookie go to the doctors? ... because he felt crumby!"
"How many? How many pessimists does it take to change a light bulb? None - it's probably screwed it too tight anyhow!"
"Have you ever smelled mothballs? How did you get their little legs apart?"
"How come when a woman is pregnant, people rub her tummy...? How come when a woman is pregnant, people rub her tummy and say, ""Congratulations"" but no one rubs the guy's balls and says ""Good job""?!"
"Don't stay inside and get depressed about the news. Go outside and get skin cancer!"