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Joke of the Day

"What is the first thing ghosts do when they get into a car? They fasten their sheet (seat) belts."

"If you want to hide your face, go out naked."

"Oh nothing, just editing this agreement. And by editing, I mean writing ""ool J"" after every mention of an LLC."

"I love killing for fun ""Sociopath! Arrest him!"" I mean I love hunting ""Why didn't you say so my good man, want to kill together sometime?"""

"My son sounds like a goat when he cries. He's just a little kid."

"A robot walks into a bar, orders a drink, and lays down some cash. The bartender says, ""we don't serve robots."" The robot replies, ""oh, but some day you will."""

"Some guy who wasn't looking where he was going hit me with a stick today So I beat the shit out of him. And for good measure kicked his Labrador too."

"I like to make a sandwich with just cucumbers and pickles... I call it the Before and After"

"The thing I love most about dad jokes... ...is how they keep pushing the boundaries of humour father and father."

"A calculus joke... Person 1: What's the integral of 1/cabin with respect to cabin? Person 2: A log cabin! Person 1: No, a houseboat. You forgot to add the C!!"