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Joke of the Day

"I asked Rick Astley to lend me some Pixar movies...... He said you can take Cars, you can take Toy Story but I'm never gonna give you Up."

Next Joke
 
"I was expecting ""The Last Airbender"" to be a disappointment. I was not disappointed."
"How do you greet a British programmer named Cathryn? 'Allo-cate"
"Einstein's mother asks him ""are you happy."" Einstein replies ""relatively."""
"A blonde strolls into her new office job at 10:30 The manager comes up to her and says, ""you should have been here at nine o'clock,"" to which the blonde responds ""why what happened?"""
"TIL: After Pearl Harbor, US warships fired upon friendly u boats heading back to port. Whoops, wrong sub."
"Why is poo tapered? So your arse doesn't slam."
"I seriously hate it when a couple starts having an argument in front of you. They could have least waited until I got dressed and left."
"Grammar Nazis see things only two ways The Reich way or the wrong way"
"Hipster Jokes How does the hipster have an orgasm? ""I came like so long ago"" Why do hipsters hate rivers? They are too mainstream How much weed does a hipster usually smoke? An Instagram"