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Joke of the Day

"In order to always win in rock, paper, scissors... Shoot."

"My favorite sex position? Boy there's so many to choose from. Ha Ha. *starts sweating* I'd have to pick, um, reverse...shortstop? I gotta go"

"Donald Trump has been making headlines, ""Trump Taps Secretaries."" by grabbing Generals. He's come a long way from grabbing privates."

"I brought my Beats headphones to work, and instead of being left alone, I've had 7 rap battles and am in the finals against A$AP Carol."

"What do you call a vampire, that follows the rules? Draculaw"

"Why doesn't Moses buy beer? He brews it."

"Why did the scarecrow get an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"

"Whats the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of an abortion clinic? Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger"

"Why don't midgets smoke weed? Because they can't get high."

"How do you clear out an Iraqi bingo parlour? Call out ""B-52"""