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Joke of the Day
"When life gives you melons... You're probably dyslexic."
Next Joke
"Why is suicide illegal? Because no one wants to clean up your mess."
"If you have sex with a girl on Monday then your boy has sex with her on Tuesday, did he retweet her vagina?"
"My Future I have a lot more trust and faith in my guidance counselor's advice after getting an empty fortune cookie at a chinese restaurant."
"Why don't witches wear underwear? So they can get a better grip on the broom."
"When you neutralize an acidic solution in a titration, what do you do? Drop the base."
"What's the difference between a well dressed man and a tired dog? The man wears a full suit, the dog just pants"
"Saw a teen couple buying condoms in the pharmacy so I let my grandbaby run around their feet & whispered 'that's the brand my daughter used'"
"Swallowed two pieces of string this morning. A little while ago they came out tied together... I shit you knot!"
"""Please stand for the Paralympic anthem."""