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Joke of the Day

"So I posted this on r/ShowerThoughts ""I wonder where I put the soap?"" (Mods deleted it.)"

"I haven't pooped in a couple weeks I'm not constipated, I'm just procrapstinating"

"You're the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard."

"The MAIN reason why I don't let my Girlfriend play my X-Box!! ... I don't have a girlfriend."

"How did the chickens dance at the Christmas party ? Chick to chick !"

"From what I hear about time spent with abortion doctor's they're really not all that bad Many patients have claimed it's really brought the kid out in them."

"Dear Genitals, Thank you for not bleeding every month. Sincerely, A Man"

"I asked my priest if it might be a good idea to stop masturbating But he didn't take the hint"

"If I could have sex with anyone, living or dead, I'd probably pick living."

"Today, I cleaned the house. It was awesome. My favorite part was finding things I didn't remember having. Like where'd these kids come from?"