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Joke of the Day
"I visited a dyslexic Christian clairvoyant today... She read my Psalm"
Next Joke
"Worst Excuses For Being Late 5) Too many dragons 4) Out of dragons 3) I'm not late, Steve is 2) Time is fake 1) Made a list of excuses"
"A severed foot... ...is the ultimate stocking stuffer. - Mitch Hedberg"
"(OC) Wanna know my secret to not catching STD's? I have kleenexes."
"I don't need a girlfriend to get action... The Pokemon servers go down on me all the time."
"me: annie are you ok so annie are you ok are you ok annie (X5) girl [wearing name tag that says annie]: sir will it be paper or plastic"
"Guys. GUYS! Every issue of National Geographic is now on DVD-ROM. FINALLY! God I've missed masturbating to sweet aborigine pancake titties!"
"Studies shows that most people don't know the opposites to these words: Always Coming From Take Me Down"
"You may think a squirt of water in the face is the best way to reprimand cats but turns out it works pretty well on people too."
"yo mamma so fat she make a whale look bulimic"