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Joke of the Day

"Make your own bacon by tricking a pig into running headlong through a harp."

"""nice dog or cat or baby or whatever"" i offer politely, my eyes scanning the room for the taco dip. ""was it expensive?"""

"Going as a hashtag for Halloween so everybody ignores me."

"My local movie theater was robbed of $200 last night. They stole a tub of popcorn, two sodas and a box of Milk Duds."

"Yo mama is so fat that she needs a book mark to keep track of all her chin rolls!"

"I have a joke about fat people with big butts... Butt weight... That's not fanny."

"HAHAHA...sorry....dont hate me Donald Trump....enough said"

"Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated? Snow boarding is fun as hell."

"What do an alcoholic and a necrophiliac have in common? They both like to pop open a nice cold one."

"A girl never comments on another unless she's jealous."