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Joke of the Day

"Why do terrorists in Antarctica love being interrogated? Snow boarding is fun as hell."

"My friend and I applied for work at the new submarine factory. I don't know if we'll get jobs, but we'll see what surfaces."

"This hotel has the worst mini-bar. All the little bottles of booze taste like shampoo."

"What's green and chokes superheroes? (NSFW) The Hulk's cock"

"Be careful what batteries you use. My GF uses Energizer batteries and her kid keeps going and going."

"Ryan had to go potty real bad, but the door to the potty was Lochte."

"in kindergarden i pooped my pants and got insanely mad when another kid asked me about it, and that's also the president's PR strategy"

"If Rapunzel was a brunette, she'd have just opened the front door."

"All the terrible rumors about me are true, people who spam me via DM."

"I smiled and waved at my neighbour so I bet the first thing she'll do today is buy bedroom curtains."