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Joke of the Day
"I leave spider carcasses on the wall to make sure the other spiders understand.."
Next Joke
"Yo' mamma is so dumb.... ... She put a ruler on the side of her bed to see how long she slept."
"How do you play Iraqi bingo? F18...B52...F18"
"What do you get when you have two balls in your hand? A man's undivided attention!"
"The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
"[my 1st day at press conference sign language translator job I lied on my resume to get] ME: *does Madonna's Vogue choreography for 45 min*"
"Did you hear about the guy who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now"
"I'm hoping someone puts razor blades in my daughter's Halloween candy this year because those things are ridiculously expensive."
"What do you call Hitler underwater? Adolfin."
"Star Wars has given me unrealistic expectations of who my father is."